#tw flashbacks mention

[spaciebabie]

at first getting diagnosed with cptsd was like, "yay my trauma has been validated (it always was valid)!" and i really thought that was going to be it, but then i started to do research as i do whenever i realize i have something and learned that!! the way i experience socialization is!! quite horrid actually!!

[arlecchinasmainblog]

More Epic Angst

It’s the middle of the night and shouting can be heard from the king’s chambers.

“Get your wretched hands off of me! I am done enacting your vile fantasies!”

It’s happening again.

“Odysseus, my king, my love, it is I, Penelope.”

But he couldn’t recognize that. Not now anyway.

“You are not! You are not! Cease veiling yourself as my wife you evil witch!”

Despite his wife’s gentle words, he couldn’t see her as he rocked in the fetal position; squinting his eyes shut as if he were a child hiding from an imaginary monster.

“Why must you take joy in tormenting me! I just want to go home! I just want to be home!”

The poor man cried in vain. And all his wife could do was weep. For she could not help her husband escape the prison of his confabulated captor. She could not free him from the prison of his own mind.

[namusass]

i cannot describe how disappointed i am in you all. im watching Ballerina on netflix and i come to tumblr and you're all thirsting after the guy? the guy who is a serial rapist and blackmails women into slavery? why on earth would you go for that when there is SO MUCH SAPPHIC CONTENT??????? do better, im so serious, these gays deserve so much more content. i wanna see so many gifsets, so much fic, these women are GAY and IN LOVE Ok-Ju kills SO MANY DUDES FOR MIN-HEE

[lacetrauma]

im sorry that i don’t have much to say anymore. im not as creative as I used to be

[hersurvival]

Black.

Blue eyes.

Blacked out.

Fading, falling.

Fighting for consciousness.

Every night when I start to drift,

Nodding in and out,

I'm back.

Left at a party, a bare mattress

On the floor in a back room.

Briefly awoken

By him sneaking in.

"Hey. Hey," he coos,

"It's me, we met earlier."

[discord-emote-customs]

snow leopard emojis ? :3

hi sorry friend i am infected with animal jam disease and i cant hear snow leopard or arctic wolf without having flashbacks

on a serious note , heres a sleepin snow leopard & a happy snow leopard w/ a speech bubble w/ & w/o the laughing animal jam emoji ^^

[fizziepopangel]

No Bad Vibes

“Please, don’t!” I cried as Lute approached me, ripping my weapon from my hands and tossing it aside. I backed up, stumbling over something and falling back into a puddle leaking from the nearby dumpster. “Lute, please don’t do this. Please… You’re my friend!”

Lute looked down at me, scoffing. “You’re just as pathetic as Vaggie.” She spat, raising her spear, not even a hint of remorse in her eyes despite me thinking that we had been friends. “You deserve to rot in this hellhole just like that backstabbing, demon-fucking whore!”

The pain of her spear piercing my skin was so intense that I couldn’t even scream. Blood gushed from the wound across my cheek as I fumbled for my own weapon, my efforts cut short when my friend’s boot slammed down on the back of my hand. I didn’t have time to cry out before I felt her grab a fist full of my hair, tossing me against a wall as if I were a ragdoll.

Blood gushed from wounds, but the pain was too intense to tell where exactly I was hurt; it felt like everywhere. I was struggling to breathe, only barely getting to my hands and knees before I felt it; searing pain around the base of my wings…. Nausea hit me and there was this ripping and suddenly, my vision went dark….

I woke up drenched in sweat, my chest tight as I shot up, clinging to the blanket I had burritoed myself in at some point throughout the night. The scars on my body seemed to ache as if the wounds were new, yet somehow I felt numb as I sat there, eyes focused straight ahead into the darkness of the bedroom.

“You have another nightmare, princess?” I jumped, head snapping toward the doorway where Husk stood, undoing his tie. Although I hadn’t heard the hellcat come in, I couldn’t help the overwhelming sense of relief that flooded me seeing him standing there.  

“I…I..” The words wouldn’t come, so I just sat there, shaking my head and holding onto the blanket, tears slowly beginning to roll down my cheeks.

Husk made a soft sound of sympathy as he crossed the room and took his place in bed beside me. “Aw, princess, don’t cry..” His arm wrapped around my waist, pulling me into his side. “The scars botherin’ you again? You want me to rub ‘em?” He asked, carefully wiping the tears from my eyes.

Nodding hesitantly, I let the demon slip my shirt off and direct me back to the bed. I wait a few moments before feel the cool sensation of the cocoa butter against my back. I couldn’t help but stiffen; despite having done this multiple times since we had been together, I couldn't help but be self conscious at the fact that he could see the deep, jagged scars down my back where my wings once were.

His pressure was gentle as his hands massaged the scars. “They ain’t as sensitive as they were before.” Husk said in a soft, gruff voice. “I guess Vaggie was right about massaging ‘em helpin’.”

Humming in response, I let my eyes slip shut, trying to ignore the thoughts of the day I fell. It was a moot point with Husk working to massage the angry scars down my back. “Thank you…” I mutter softly, though I knew it was probably muffled and hardly audible with my face buried in the bedding as I lay there.

Husk let out a chuckle, placing a kiss between where my wings once were before gently rolling me over and pinning me to the bed. “You ain’t gotta thank me, princess, I may be a grumpy old man, but I’d do anything for you, you know that.” His eyes filled with something I hadn’t really seen before, but something familiar all the same as he leaned down to kiss my forehead. “And I’m never gonna let anyone hurt you like that again.” 

Before I could say anything, Husk had moved, grabbing a fresh set of blankets and a fresh set of pajamas for us each. “Charlie said carrying bad vibes with ya ain’t healthy so come on, let’s get you into somethin’ you ain’t had any nightmares in.”

A giggle bubbled up in my throat as I got up to change. “So you believe in bad vibes now?”

“Nah, I still think it’s a bunch of bullshit.” Husk chuckled as he spread new sheets over our bed. “But I believe in you gettin’ your beauty sleep.” He teased.

Smiling sleepily, I flop onto the bed, nightmares and pain forgotten as I lay on the fresh bedding. “You’re coming to bed too, right?” I ask, giving him my best puppy dog eyes. “I sleep better when you’re next to me.”

The hellcat let out a sigh, running a hand down his face. “It’s poker night, baby….”

“Please?” I pout my lips slightly. “I wanna cuddle.”

“Ugh… Fuck…” He sighs again as he laid down beside me, pulling me into his chest. “You know this may be the first time I’ve ever skipped a poker night for a chick?”

“I love you too, Husk.” I yawned, already snuggling into the hellion’s soft, warm fur, feeling safer than I had in a long while as I listened to him grumble about missing his poker game while he continued to stroke my back gently. Nothing mattered in that moment, not my past, not my scars or how I got them… In that moment, it was just us.

[and-yet-the-daisies-grow]

It's been a long time since I've watched something that gave victimhood the accurately complex portrayal it deserves, both in the immediate aftermath of the event and much later in life. But Baby Reindeer definitely accomplishes that.

I'm not entirely sure what to say. I want to give this show the praises it deserves but I feel like it touched me on such a deep level that I am left speechless.

So instead, I think it might be good to express how this show made me feel and continues to make me feel. It makes me feel seen, understood. There is this cathartic, itchy, melancholic feeling around my heart and in my throat. A part of the void within me has somehow been filled out and replaced with a sense of unshakeable community and understanding for both myself and my fellow victims.

Years ago, I was having a CSA flashback at a training session. My coach wrestled with me and I was hit with a devastating sense of powerlessness. Even though he is a good man and he would never hurt me, I knew that if he wanted to, he could. I was still the same weak defenseless kid, no matter how much older or taller or stronger I got, I would never be strong enough.

I dissociated and cried quietly for a long time. I thought the tears would subside, but they just didn't. A friend took me out of the gym to get some air and hugged me. My quiet crying got louder and louder, until I was sobbing like a little kid. And I'm not a sobber, especially not in front of other people. I've cried quietly for as long as I can remember.

This show felt exactly like that hug. It's pure comfort to a part of yourself you have deemed unconsolable, completely beyond saving. Like a part of you that was taken and sacrificed and tainted by the things that happened to you, and you'll never get it back. You'll never be able to calm it down, so you just numb it out with addiction and sleep and misery.

And then something terrible happens and brings this part out, and somehow, your environment reacts with kindness and love and empathy and sadness for you and rage towards whoever hurt you, and you realize that this part of you can heal, too.

So Gadd, if you're ever reading this, I just want to say thank you. Thank you for telling your story. Thank you for comforting a part of me that I thought could experience nothing but suffering. Thank you for showing it kindness and empathy and understanding.

Thank you.

[dying-weeds]

PSA for everyone:

Being told "good girl" is very triggering for me as I have been told this by multiple people who assaulted me while it was happening.

For the love of everything please stop telling people "good girl" or "good boy" if you do not know them or are not close enough to them to know their history. I just want to go to work and do my job not have a flash back to being assaulted just because fucking Jim Bob wanted to tell me good job.

[jay-wasreblogging]

cw: sui, sa mention below.

I think as someone who looks back on what happened to them with no emotions or thought whatsoever, that it hurts much more when people apologise to you for what happened or when they start to tell you how horrible what you went through was.

I was too young to know what was happening and even when I realised what had happened - I felt nothing because I always felt as if what happened was just something that happened?

It didn't impact my life the way it did for other victims/survivors, it didn't leave any lasting scar nor trauma. I sometimes forget it ever happened so when I tell ppl about it and their reaction is shock and horror, it makes what happened so much more devastating to me because omg you're right... you're right, YOU'RE RIGHT, YOU'RE RIGHT, YOU'RE RIIIGHHTTTT!!!, what happened was wrong!! What happened was disgusting, was shocking, was life altering!! SO WHY AM I SO CALM ABOUT IT!?!! WHY TF DID I TREAT IT LIKE ANY OTHER MINOR CHILDHOOD MEMORY!?!! 😭

[dragonsdenstudiosofficial]

The Pizza Knight Saves The Princess is a fantasy-comedy choose-your-own-adventure-style visual novel being developed by Dragon's Den Studios. Set on the planet Comestibla, where everything & everyone is made of food, we play as the Pizza Knight as he tries to save his beloved Water Ice Princess from the castle of the evil Chocolate Count. You can download the demo for free HERE: https://dragons-den-studios.itch.io/the-pizza-knight-saves-the-princess

Over the course of this month I'll be posting some of the game's art to this blog! This image is a sneak peak of content only available in the full release!

This image depicts a flashback that the Pizza Knight has to his childhood after drinking one of the potions. The bearded man is his father, the Pizza Slob, an abusive, negligent drunk who took the knight away from his mother as a baby for fear that if his mother raised him alone (as the slob was planning to run away from home to avoid conscription) the knight wouldn't grow up to be a man like him. Their most recent misadventure at the time resulted in the six-year-old Pizza Knight ending up at the same school that the Water Ice Princess was attending; she quickly befriended him and invited him to play using her cryokinesis to make snow for a snowball fight. However, the slob arrived and, in a drunken stupor, attacked her because he was offended by her using magic in public. Don't worry, the story has a happy ending: the princess' parents arrived and subdued the slob, resulting in his arrest and the Pizza Knight being freed from his abuser. (The kids in the background, hiding behind a pile of water ice snow, are classmates of theirs; the lime gumdrop boy is the insufferable genius type and the candy cane girls are twins.)

[befuddled-calico-whump]

Riot Kings, page 8D

prev

[a-totally-reasonable-username]

Watching my comfort show because i have a bad day. Get triggered by that one song from the soundtrack. Have a flashback. Have a seizure episode because my body can't handle adrenaline spikes. Now in need help of comfort... Maybe i could watch my comfort show?

[s-e-a-s-l-u-g]

hi and welcome to I am having. one of the worst times of my life and I feel absolutely alone.

[bittyfromquotev]

The Noise

He didn’t care.

It was too loud.

Everyone at the return parade to celebrate their victory in the war was having fun, but Sun didn’t care.

He wanted the noise to stop.

The sound of drums and trumpets and other instruments vibrated with power in his chest, rattling the metal and wires within his scarred body. He pushed his even more ruined brother along in a wheelchair as if he was nothing more than a S.T.A.F.F. Bot. He kept moving even though all he wanted to do was run away and hide. He wanted quiet. The large band parted eventually, forcing Sun to roll a crippled Moon and himself through the tunnel of noise.

The band grew ten times louder than before, blaring into Sun’s audio sensors and forcing him to hunch over. He tried to stand straight again for the people, he really tried, but he couldn’t. It’s as if his joints rusted in place.

He pursed what would be his lips together, biting on the soft material that made up his tongue. He would get through this even if he had to be reset because of the delayed reactions to his panic this would bring.

The band wouldn’t stop. As the rest of the military branches followed behind Sun and the army, the noise got increasingly louder. The civilians at the parade cheered with all their might every time someone announced something on the booming microphone. Images of a hospital flashed though Sun’s mind. A hospital. Snow. Red snow. The screams of the Ukrainian victims. The ones he and his comrades were unable to save. Moon’s leg, lying mangled in the dirty snow several yards away from who it belonged to. Instead of the overjoyed faces that were actually there, Sun saw faces of fading hope.

The faces of defeat that were plastered on the victims of the war.

His grip on Moon’s wheelchair tightened as he looked on. Luckily, it wasn’t long before they all came to a stop. The military that walked, the band that played, the people that cheered.

It all stopped.

However sudden it was, the relief was obvious as soon as his sensors processed the silence.

Sun didn’t care for Moon’s concerned gaze trained on him as he breathed a sigh of relief.

All was quiet.

He would be okay.

[inevitablemoment]

Egon and Dana Friendship Headcanons

Okay, I’m so happy to see that my post offering Egon and Dana friendship headcanons gained enough interest, so... enjoy! It’s all under the cut.

The gang lets Dana (and Louis) crash at the firehouse when the Gozer incident leads to the subsequent demolition of the building on Central Park West.

Dana suffers a lot from night terrors, and not wanting to bother Peter, leaves the room to clear her head and sees Egon working in the lab late one night.

Egon and Dana get to talking, and he ends up opening up to her about the loss of his wife, as well as the custody of his daughter Callie.

Dana continues to struggle with the trauma of her experience, and Egon offers to let her and Peter spend a few days at his and Cathleen’s old lake house upstate.

When Dana and Peter’s relationship begins to fall apart, Egon makes it very clear that he will not be their “go-between,” which Dana is able to accept.

About a year after Dana and Peter break up, she begins dating Andre Wallance.

Even if he’s rubbed the wrong way by Andre, Egon is supportive of Dana’s new relationship-- she’s even able to convince Andre to let Egon be one of his groomsmen.

About halfway through Dana’s pregnancy, Andre auditioned for a traveling orchestra and was accepted.

As Andre wasn’t there for Oscar’s birth, Egon ended up being Dana’s Lamaze partner.

When Oscar was only a few weeks old, Andre returned from the tour, but told Dana that he was scouted by the manager of an orchestra in London.

Not wanting to uproot her life after just having a baby, on top of the other issues that they were facing, Dana filed for divorce.

She dealt with some pretty rough postpartum depression, but Egon always came through to help her.

It was rough for him, as Callie’s mother, Cathleen, also struggled with postpartum depression after Callie’s birth.

After defeating Vigo, Egon tries to call Callie, but his mother-in-law lies to him and says that Callie doesn’t want to talk to him, and Dana comforts him.

When Egon begins claiming that Gozer will return, it leads to Dana having a panic attack, which Peter verbally castrates him over.

The night before Egon leaves for Summerville, Dana visits him and he apologizes like he had never apologized before.

She forgives him and expresses concern for his increasingly erratic behavior.

He again apologizes and says goodbye to her.

Years later, in 2021, Dana is surprised when Janine Melnitz shows up at her and Peter’s door.

Janine tells her that Egon died, and that he was right all along about Gozer returning.

The two are able to convince the three remaining Ghostbusters to go to Summerville (though Ray needs a little more push), but Dana remains in New York.

A week in between the end of the film and the mid-credits scene of her and Peter, Dana and Oscar go to Summerville together.

Egon’s ghost shows up and they both tell them about all that he missed in the past thirty years.

Egon shares one final hug with his surrogate sister and nephew before he returns to his place in the afterlife.